Saturday, May 25, 2013

Simple words in a complicated world!

 Some of the guys out with my husband were asked: Depending on how things go, Who would want to go home early?

By early they mean at like 9ish months vs the full year. Most of the guys wanted to stay out there. My husband was the first and I believe the only guy that said, "Send me home!" The majority of the guys out there with my husband are single. So to them living at "camp cupcake" is not a bad gig really. The ones that are married have there reasons for wanting to stay. Most will tell you its complicated but once you get to know them It comes down to money or an unhappy home. I can't help but think how sad!

 Deployment pay is not that great! Personally I would have to make a heck of a lot more to want my spouse to stay gone (deployed) but I guess its one of those perspectives things. How much is my husband being home worth to me? Well, if I had to, I would eat noodles every night and skip the internet and ....  But that is me, I live by the idea that he and I can figure anything out as long as we are together. The guys that have the unhappy homes, I just feel sick for them. To want to be away from home because things are that unhealthy with your spouse. I don't know the details of other peoples marriages, but I have to say I don't understand why you would live like that. Maybe all those couples need is some counseling or maybe they will end up divorced. I don't know but it makes me sad for them.

I guess I hear these things and then I listen to my husband saying, "I miss you and the kids! If I get the opportunity, I am coming home. A six month deployment or a one year deployment does not reflect any differently my record. It just shows up as a completed deployment. So if they are wanting to send some guys home, I will be saying 'PICK ME, PICK ME' and jumping on the plane!"

I hear his logic, his love, his longing and his humor! My heart warms and I am yet again reminded of how lucky I am to be in such a great relationship and with such a great guy.

So many big moments during this deployment, our sons first steps, first words, first Christmas, his first birthday, our daughters 7th birthday, her upcoming dance recital, her first black eye, my "cough, cough" 21st birthday, my husband reached his ten year anniversary with the Marine Corps and we are coming up on our four year anniversary.  You can't get those moments back. You share them as best you can over letters, e-mail, skype and phone calls. However there is no way to replace being there, sharing those moments.

Reflecting on all this, all the big moments, the little moments, and those whom would trade a few hundred dollars or are "stuck" in an unhappy marriage so they would rather stay deployed. Then hearing my husband his heart felt love and the simple words of:

 "I want to come home!"

Those words make my eyes well with tears and mean the world to me. They warm and reach pieces of me I did not even realize existed.

Feeling all the love in the world and a longing for this wonderful man that I could not dream of finding the words to explain.

Crossing my fingers but not holding my breath that my Chirstmas present arrives early this year! 

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