Monday, July 1, 2013

Oh Reality!

As most of you know at about the 5th month of this deployment I hit a funk. I tried shaking it in all kinds of cleaver ways. The best really was cranking the radio to some old school music. Although I did shake it for Luke Brian once or twice. :) In truth part of what helped me get through that funk was knowing summer was around the corner and I would be headed "home" with the kids.This fateful spot is where fantasy vacation home started forming its wonderful picture in my head. 

In my mind my husbands parents were going to show up at the airport. Pick up this tired family, tuck me into bed and wrap the kids in there grand-parently love and attention. I would sleep as much as I needed or wanted, drink coffee, eat wonderful meals made by someone else all "with out interruption." I would pat my children on their heads in passing to read a book. I would smile as the grandparents lovingly met all of the kids needs. My days would be filled with relaxing, peaceful, loving hours.  Oh, that was the dream.

Then we arrive home and reality hit. My husbands parents have lives. How dare they have lives outside of our visit. Sure they play with the kids from time to time. but, what is up with me still having to be a mom? Did they not get my fantasy vacation mental memo!

This trip sure started out differently then my mental plans. Mom's cats caused my allergies to act up, then one of them peed in my suitcase. My son sees the grandparents and great-grand parents homes, filled with all kinds of breakable things at his level as these new wonderful places to explore and play. His very own kind of heaven. I get a lot of exercise chasing him and experience with the word No. I started singing it from time to time to make it more fun, vs say fa la la I sing No no No no! A variety of shopping and family dinners, extended family dinners. Where I actually have to care for my own child(ren) and interact with people. Take a bite, chase the baby, take a bite, chase the baby. Humm, no need to worry about putting on weight. lol My son did not take kindly to the time change and had me up a few times each night and at the crack of dawn every morning. hummm, this was not at all in my fantasy plans. :)

For all the hundreds of ways this fantasy going home vacation has not gone as I had fantasized.  After getting over my initial disappointment. I have kicked my funk and am having a good time. I enjoy being back "home" watching our son experience a new place. The view at great grandpas and peacefulness in the evenings.. (after the kids in bed. :) This place is something so soothing and fulfilling I don't think i could stay in a funk if i wanted to.

So tonight I will toast to letting go of fantasy and enjoying my reality! My reality with a little sense of humor and a change of perspective really is a very beautiful thing.

No comments:

Post a Comment